Back! Again? Well... maybe...

Well, it's been a long time.

I don't know how often I'll blog here anymore. I don't know how much time I'll have.

I don't really have the time right now, I just have a lot on my weight-loss mind and I need to air it out.

So, if you go back and read all my posts you'll see that I mostly wrote about my journey as a Weight Watchers Lifetime member, maintaining at goal.

Then, in 2011 I got pregnant and stopped Weight Watchers (obviously) and blogging as well.

In 2012, my beautiful daughter was born and I was told that breast feeding would melt away the pounds. Which it did - but not all of them. Eight months after my daughter was born I was back down to about 145 (about 20 pounds over goal). But once Halloween and the holidays hit that year, I started to creep back up to about 155. That's when I went back to my weekly Weight Watchers meeting in January of 2013.

Between January and may I lost about 20 pounds and I was back in the 130's and I hit a plateau. I was counting points, running with a buddy and our babies in the jogging stroller, but I just wasn't moving. It was at that point that I asked my leader to change my Lifetime Member goal weight. I remembered thinking that I was healthy and active - why was I still paying them? So she changed my lifetime goal to 136. Which was fine. I figured I'd had a baby and I was about 13 years older than I was when I set my goal weight to begin with.

And then my plateau broke and I was able to get back down to my original goal weight! Yay! I went shopping for all new clothes! I was feeling great!

And then, life happened. I signed up to take a 45 credit graduate class that would give me a specialized reading certification in the 2014-2015 school year. And I was *blessed* with the worst class of my 17 years as a teacher. Between the stress of my students and the stress of my education, my exercise came to a grinding halt. And my food choices became worse and worse. I was eating like garbage again, not tracking anything... I was still going to meetings occasionally but every meeting I went to the scale was going up, and up, and up...

Fast forward to October of 2015 and I was back to 146. Again. And that's when I said - ok, that's it. Let's get serious.

So I started tracking consistently for a few weeks and lost a few pounds :)

But it wasn't going fast enough for me, so I started working out again (3 days a week/40 minutes) and I lost a few more pounds :)

And then the holidays came and I put my exercise on hold, but continued to track with only a few days of over indulgence and I was still able to lose a couple more pounds :)

Which brings me to January. And why I'm here writing today getting all this off my chest.

So a couple of weeks ago, I started working out in earnest again. I bought Body Shred by Jillian Michaels (it was an Amazon deal of the day!) which required six days a week for 30 minutes. Which I've been sticking to for the past two weeks.

I've been tracking meticulously - never going over my total points (I do eat my weeklies but  usually have a few left over).

And the scale just. isn't. moving.

In fact, I've gained two pounds since Monday.

So here's what I've been thinking:

• Yes, I know I shouldn't weigh myself everyday when I'm trying to lose weight. But as a life time member I always weighed every day. It's an old habit - hard to break.
• This is about where I plateaued before and I think it may be hormonal. I've read that when your breast feeding your body will cling to those last 10 pounds like life depended on it. (And yes, you're doing the math right, I am still nursing my almost 4 year old once or twice a day. It's normal, get over it.)
• When you start a new workout (especially one that has you going at it six days a week) your body is going to retain fluid as you start to build muscle and shed fat.
• I am starting to measure my waist, arms, chest, etc. in an effort to see some progress. But I'm not scheduled to measure for a couple more days so I don't have those results.
• I know it's not the time of the month because my birth control stops my periods (which I like, so that's not changing any time soon).
• The plateau broke before, and I'm (mostly) confident that it will break again. 

I'm just frustrated. It's hard to see the scale go like this:
Monday 135.4
Tuesday 136.4
Wednesday 137
Thursday 137.4

I know variation is normal - that's why I used to weigh myself daily when I was maintaining: to keep track of those variations.

But it's not varying. It's just going up. Ugh.

Anyway, I just needed to get all that off my chest.

In the meantime, if you go back and read my blog you'll see that I was a DIE HARD Firm girl. Well, I bought Body Shred because I figured maybe I needed to shake things up. But when it's over I will be going back to the Firm. Maybe mixing the two together depending on my mood. And, sadly, "The Firm" is no more. But the lovely instructors have their own company coming out with new streaming workouts so I'll be checking those out too!

And last time the program switched I did a pretty comprehensive review of the change from Point to PointsPlus. Now, Weight Watchers is using SmartPoints. But I won't be doing a huge review. Sufficed to say, I've adapted to the new points system and have figured out a way to enjoy the foods I always have with the new program so it's been a harmless shift.

I don't think I'll stay here. I'm sure this plateau will break. It's just a matter of when. In the mean time, I've got to stay focused on being healthy.

I have to remember that I do the things I do, and make the choice I make for me, for my health. Not for a number on a scale.

I wish I could keep this blog going three times a week like I used to... But with a child I just don't have the luxury of much free time. And the free time I have I spend either cleaning, working out!, or sleeping...

But this felt good. Maybe I'll come back here more.

If you've read all of this, thanks.