Happy Anniversary.

This month will mark 19 years since I've reached my goal weight with WW.

Wow. 19 Years.

I wish I could remember the date I stepped on that scale. I don't. I'm not always good with remembering anniversaries like that.

I remember two weeks prior I was sooooooo close and I thought "Next week, I'll be at goal!" But then that next week I only lost 0.2 lol. The universe heard me and thought it'd be fun to mess with me I guess.

But the week after that I did make it to goal. My leader (who, incidentally is still my leader today) brought me to the front of the room and asked me to share my journey with the group. What made me walk through the door that first day. How has my life changed? What did I think were the most significant habits that made me successful? I remember crying.

So, as I sit here 19 years later, I'm reflecting on how much has changed since then, and how much has stayed the same.

First the same:

I still go to my workshops.

I still track my food most days.

I still weigh and measure my portions most days.

I still look up the points of foods I'm going to eat.

I still plan my days and weeks so I can stay on track.

I still meal prep and food shop.

You see, the things you did to lose the weight are the same things you need to do in order to maintain. So for the most part, I am, and always will be, a weight watcher at heart (I don't care what they rename it).

Now, the different:

My why has shifted. No longer is maintenance about cute clothes and a bikini body. I want to be healthy and strong for the long haul. I want to ward off age related diseases that are exacerbated by obesity. I want to not only live a long life, but I want to enjoy it. I want to be able to take my future grandchildren to Disney without having to rent a scooter to keep up with them. (Don't get me wrong, the cute clothes and the bikini body are nice to have - but it's not what drives my overall daily decisions about food and activity).

My goal weight is now 6 pound higher. When I joined I was 24. I'm now over forty. And I've had a child. My current weight goal is a realistic expectation of what I can maintain without going crazy and it gives me some wiggle room to live and enjoy a glass of wine with dinner. It took a long time to get to the headspace where I was ok with this. But I've finally, truly accepted that it's OK to be a size six instead of a size four.

So, the big question I get a lot is: "Have you kept it off all that time?"

No. No I have not.

Not counting my pregnancy, there have be several other times in the last 19 years where I have shifted my priorities away from my health and wellness and focused on other things. When that's happened, I stop tracking, stop going to workshops, stop working out, and - naturally - I gain some of the weight back.

Thankfully, I've never gained it all back. Of the 33 pounds I initially lost, the most I'd ever gained back was about 20. I usually try to stop it somewhere between 5 and 10 pounds gained. That's when the clothes stop fitting, and I go back to workshops, go back to basics (tracking, weighing, measuring, planning and meal prep) and get my butt back in shape.

So, what will the next 19 years be like? Hopefully, much of the same. Do I expect to be perfect? Nope. Will I always go back to WW when I stray? You bet. No matter what life brings, this will always be a part of me.

Thank you WW for giving me the knowledge and the tools to change my life.